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Showing posts with label Family infertility new york egg donor jewish egg donors surrogacy twiblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family infertility new york egg donor jewish egg donors surrogacy twiblings. Show all posts

Sunday, May 6, 2012

FAMILY BUILDING NETWORK SUPPORT GROUP MEETING Wednesday May 16, 2012 7-8:30PM



The Monthly Support Group, lead by Patricia Mendell, LCSW, is dedicated to helping families formed through egg/sperm/embryo donation and surrogacy, create healthy and lasting connections.  

Everyone has a unique Story about their family. For parents planning to disclose, telling the Family Story can seem overwhelming.


Discussions will  include:
·        The importance of language in the disclosure story
·        Latest research on children and families
·        Age appropriate books for donor offspring children
·        How to answer questions from your child and others
·        How to begin “The Talk”
·        How childrens’ questions change over time
·        What to tell siblings


Date:

Time:

Cost:

Location:


Contact:

Wednesday April 18, 2012

7:00-8:30 pm

$25 per person, $40 per family

902 Broadway (between 20th-21st Sts. next to
920 Broadway), 13th Floor, NYC 10010

Patricia Mendell, LCSW, 212-819-1778
Call to reserve a space


Future Dates: 5/16/12, 6/20/12

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Guest Blogger Melissa Brisman ~ WHO IS THE MOTHER?




Welcome and thank you to Melissa Brisman, Esq, who has written in about the newest developments in surrogacy laws in NY State, which she has been instrumental in changing as she has in NJ and elsewhere in the Northeast. Here she explains the change and how it differs from egg donor contracts as well.

WHO IS THE MOTHER?
Why should a genetic mother have to adopt her child because the child was born to a gestational surrogate?

Why should a genetic mother’s rights differ from that of a genetic father?

In a recent case, we argued these issues and won. See T.V. v. New York State Department of Health, 6557/09 (http://www.nycourts.gov/reporter3dseries/2011/2011_06229.htm)

Facts

A gestational surrogate offered to carry a child without compensation for her close friends, a married couple, because the wife had undergone a hysterectomy, and was unable to carry a child. The wife’s eggs were fertilized with her husband’s sperm. Therefore, the resulting embryo contained the genetic make up of both the husband and wife, i.e. the intended parents. There was no genetic connection between the gestational surrogate and the embryo. If had an egg donor been used and fertilized with the husband’s sperm, there would have been no genetic link between the wife/intended mother and the embryo.

When the child was born, the New York Department of Health issued a birth certificate which placed the gestational surrogate’s name as mother, and did not include any name as father. After the birth, the genetic father’s name was added to the birth certificate, but the name of the gestational surrogate remained on the birth certificate. In order to correct the inaccuracy, the genetic mother’s only option would have been to request and file an adoption of her own genetic child. We argued that this violated the genetic mother’s constitutional rights to equal protection and due process.

Decision

In a unanimous decision published on August 9, 2011, the Appellate Decision sided with the genetic parents by finding that an adoption is the “legal process by which a parent/child relationship is created where none previously existed,” in this case however, “there is already a preexisting relationship, a genetic link, between the Genetic Mother and her child which cannot be ignored.” As a result, a genetic mother, who uses a gestational surrogate, can now have her name placed on the birth certificate through a post birth proceeding. Such proceeding does not need to meet the stringent requirements of an adoption (i.e. criminal background check, fingerprinting and a home study investigation).

Constitutionally and psychologically, this is a significant victory not only for mothers, but women as well.

Melissa B. Brisman is an attorney who practices exclusively in the field of reproductive law and is considered by her peers to be a leader in her profession. Ms. Brisman’s experience and qualifications are unparalleled. She employs an experienced and qualified staff of legal and administrative professionals and is licensed to practice law in Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York and Pennsylvania. Ms. Brisman has a practice, Melissa B. Brisman, Esq., LLC, located in Montvale, New Jersey, offering a full range of legal services in connection with gestational carrier arrangements, ovum, sperm, and embryo donation, and adoption. In addition, Ms. Brisman is sole owner of Reproductive Possibilities, LLC. Reproductive Possibilities, LLC is an agency offering a donor record-keeping service which maintains contact information for intended parents and their anonymous ovum donors for a period of years following a donor arrangement. Reproductive Possibilities, LLC also facilitates gestational carrier arrangements. Ms. Brisman is also sole owner of Surrogate Fund Management, LLC, a company that manages escrow in connection with reproductive arrangements.


Melissa B. Brisman, Esq. LLC
One Paragon Drive, Suite 158
Montvale, NJ 07645
P: 201-505-0099
F: 201-505-0097
http://www.reproductivelawyer.com/

Owner of:
Reproductive Possibilities, LLC and
Surrogate Fund Management, LLC
P: 201-505-0078
F: 201-505-0994
http://www.reproductivepossibilities.com/
http://www.surrogatefundmanagement.com/



Saturday, August 6, 2011

More Information About The 14th World Congress on Human Reproduction in Melbourne, Australia

DONOR LINKING SYMPOSIUM
Presented in association with the 14th World Congress on Human Reproduction
by:
* the Australian & New Zealand Infertility Counsellors Association
* Victorian Assisted Reproductive Treatment Authority
* Donor Conception Support Group of Australia

Dec 4/11. Melbourne, Australia
Open to the general public & health professionals.

Info: http://www.humanreproduction2011.com/associated-meetings/anzica/

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Saturday, May 28, 2011

DONOR PARENTING STUDY AT THE Center for Attachment Research at the New School for Social Research

I WILL CONTINUE TO SEND MORE INFO AS I GET IT. THIS IS THEIR LETTER IN RESPONSE TO MY INQUIRY. 

The Center for Attachment Research at the New School is engaged in the application of attachment theory to clinical and developmental research questions concerning child, parent, and family development.

We are about to begin a new line of research and would like to invite you and your family to become involved. The study intends to explore child and family development in a group of children who were conceived through assisted reproduction.  There is little known about the emotional and social development of children conceived through assisted reproduction, and we are searching for participants to help us build knowledge in the hopes of benefitting those who may utilize assisted reproduction the future.

We are specifically looking at the relationship between parents and their six to eight year old children who were conceived through egg donation.  This study involves one visit to our Child Development facility at the Center for Attachment Research at the New School for Social Research at 80 Fifth Avenue in New York City.  As part of this study, families would participate in a series of assessments that will focus on aspects of child development and the parent-child relationship. All of these assessments have been specifically designed to be of interest to the children and the families. We are especially focused on learning from you by using state of the art measures that will help us better understand the strengths and challenges unique to each family.

In return for contributing to a greater understanding of parent and child relationships following assisted reproduction, parents will receive a DVD highlighting their experience with their child at the Center for Attachment Research.

For more information about the study please contact Jenna Slutsky at ParentChildResearch123@gmail.com or 917.750.0692.


For more information about the Center for Attachment Research contact M. Steele (steelem@newschool.edu, OR visit the following website: http://www.attachmentresearch.com/

Sunday, May 15, 2011

DONOR DISCLOSURE 0N VOICE AMERICA 5.12.11

THERESA ERICKSON AND PATRICIA MENDELL ON DONOR DISCLOSURE ON VOICE AMERICA 5.12.11

Thought you might be interested in sharing the link to yesterday's radio show with your group members. Patricia Mendell provided lots of great information about the challenges of donor disclosure. As you probably know, she and Jean Benward wrote some excellent fact sheets on the subject for The AFA. 
 
Here is the link: http://www.voiceamerica.com/episode/53763/the-surrogacy-lawyer-radio-program-discusses-to-disclose-or-not-to-disclose-the-challenges-of-gamete 
 

Yourfertilitydeal Weekly E-Mail

A session with Fertility Advocate Pamela Madsen and more offers at:

http://us2.campaign-archive1.com/?u=dddfd65627de1b444a78e8974&id=f0b0f7af2c&e=7ee954bc6e

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Preferred Health Partners invites you to Meet & Greet the Infertility Specialist Vincent T. Brandeis, MD, FACOG

Preferred Health Partners invites you to
Meet & Greet the Infertility Specialist
Vincent T. Brandeis, MD, FACOG
Board Certified Reproductive Endocrinologist & Infertility Specialist
“Exploring Fertility Options ”
Thursday, April 28, 2011
5:30 pm-7:00 pm
Meet Dr. Vincent T. Brandeis as he discusses Assisted Reproductive technologies, (ART) such as In Vitro fertilization (IVF), IVF with donor egg, and more
Downtown Center
447 Atlantic Avenue @ Nevins Street
Brooklyn, New York 11217
This seminar is free of charge. Refreshments will be provided. RSVP @1-866-791-0993 or visit www.brooklyndocs.com

Friday, April 15, 2011

Workshops, Books and Spring Wishes from IAC Center



April, 2011     Volume 7,  Number 2
Hello,

I hope you will join us this spring for a brand new workshop: Frontload Your Child NOW for the challenges of Adolescence offered in BOTH Montclair on May 7, 2011 and Pennington May 14, 2011; and check out some great reading suggestions here too.

Lately I have been reading A LOT.  This may be due to the crazy weather which meant more time indoors; or possibly because reading keeps me on the stair master just a little bit longer, or that there are just so many good books.  I am up to a book a week and loving it. Some of these books have infertility and adoption themes, so I would like to share those with you.


  1. "Moloka'i"  is a beautiful and moving story about Rachel, a Hawaiian woman who contracts leprosy as a seven-year-old child in the 1890s and is deported to the island of Moloka'i, where she grows to adulthood in a quarantined settlement. We follow Rachel from youth, to her marriage to a fellow leper; to the birth of their healthy daughter, who they must give up for adoption to prevent infection; to Rachel's final years after sulfa drugs are discovered as a cure, leaving her free to seek out her family and daughter. Whether you read "Moloka'i"  for the history, to witness Rachel's resilience or to learn about adoption triad themes, this book is a great read.     
  2. On Fertile Ground: Healing Infertility by Helen Adrienne, a RESOLVE therapist, hypnotist and well-respected colleague of mine approaches the mind/body experience of infertility with practical exercises and solid mind/body stress reduction techniques.  Her approach provides inspiring benefits for building resilience, and learning how to respond rather than react to all kinds of life challenges.  
  3. In On It: What Adoptive Parents Would Like You To Know About Adoption. A Guide for Relatives and Friends  This is THE GIFT for your friends and family so they can understand and support your adoption journey. All I can say is that we are very lucky that Elisabeth O'Toole wrote this book because she really gets what this experience is all about, and coaches those you love to get it too.   
  4. A revised and updated version Adam Pertman's Adoption Nation  is about the changing role of adoption in American society; and includes current portrayals of adoption triad members and solid analysis about the politics, legalities, economics, and sociology of adoption. Putting adoption in its social context can be helpful to you, your family and friends. 
I wrote a new Adoptive Families Magazine (March/April issue) article: Surviving Infertility   about what it's normal to feel, even after you adopt and fall in love with your child. It may not be what you expected and in that way validating for many of you.
Speaking of children, it is never too early to start looking ahead! Whether you are a parent or a parent-to-be we recommend that you join us for our May Workshop:  Frontload Your Child NOW for the Challenges of AdolescenceWe are offering this workshop in Montclair  on May 7,2011 and in Pennington  May 14, 2011.   

This cutting edge workshop about the challenges of parenting came out of numerous IAC Center Counselor case discussion meetings in which it was often quite clear to us that families presenting with concerns about their kids would have benefited greatly if they had come into counseling much earlier.

Early intervention or prevention that results from looking ahead and thinking through certain issues gives parents a leg up. You can consciously develop parenting styles and skills that will position you and your children better for the inevitable challenges of the older child and teen years. And of course it is much easier to intervene before a child or often a parent's suffering has gone on for awhile. So join us... because they ALL grow up! And you want to help your child to be the best he or she can be.    

With the weather finally becoming beautiful, my plan is to invest in some really comfortable outside chairs so I can continue my reading odyssey in the fresh air. Please send me your picks as there are never too many books! I am at JMantellmsw@iaccenter.com and welcome your suggestions, and any questions or comments about our favorite topics: infertility, adoption and resilience.

Dare I say it.....Happy Spring!


  

IAC Center Director


Upcoming IAC Center Workshops


IAC Center Groups with Openings

See our calendar  
We have many groups for:
o    Infertility
o    Pre-adoptive parents
o    Adoptive Parents
o    Children and Teens

We LOVE groups and believe that there is nothing like support to help you through the hard times and to increase your resilience to deal with adversity. Learn something, feel better, even have a laugh.  Visit our Calendar to learn more.
Counseling offers a non-biased overview of family building options to facilitate individuals and couples in making timely decisions that are mindful of long term implications. Using a life-long short-term counseling model, counseling is available throughout the adoption life cycle for all adoption triad members.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

A Conversation with Nancy Block of the Donor Network Alliance on the Film Eggsploitation and the upcoming Radio Show

Thanks to Nancy for sharing her thoughts with me before Thursday's Show on Voice America with Theresa Erickson. We'll be on at 2PM EST to talk about the film Eggsploitation. 

Here's what Nancy wrote to me:

Let me put a few things into words if I may
 
From a medical perspective as a former OB, infertility and gyne Oncology nurse I feel for those who have such heartache getting and keeping a pregnancy. When we interview a donor, it may seem as though we are trying to talk them out of donating. We point out the pro's and cons.

I have in my posession some incredible letters written by donors to their past IP's. I have letters from donors who chose to donate more than once for the same family so their children would have their own connection. The thoughts that are expressed by these young women are amazing and very well thought out and mature. Women today are much more goal oriented than I was at their age. They have a "bucket list" of things to do before they think about having a family. They want to be prepared and ready and also continue their education while doing something fulfilling for others.

I can't explain why it happens but when the IP's and donors send notes to each other (through the agency anonymously) they find their connection with each other and that keeps them going. NOT the money. Anyone can go to the doctor's office and have vaginal ultrasounds and blood work but when a donor has heard from her IP, a simple thank you even, keeps donors going and stay on task and feel there really is a person waiting. Not just a tech in the doctors office.
 
I am a mother, never thought about anything other than getting married and having children after nursing school. Why should anyone be denied that option?  Why can't someone make a family whole?

We live in the United States of America where we cherish our freedom...how can these people continue to argue what someones feelings are? Even if I didn't do this type of work, I would still be supportive. We have to speak up for those that have never had a family member or close friend or patient experience the loss of being able to have a healthy pregnancy and baby.
 
Hope this helps in some way.
Nancy Block, Donor Network Alliance    egg411@gmail.com

Yes Nancy, it does help. Thanks for sharing this with us. I wish we had done more to thank our donor personally at the time, and had the kind of correspondence that you mention. I know she was cared for medically and treated respectfully by our clinic and that our appreciation for what she did to help us to try to start our family was conveyed to her nonetheless.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Voice America Radio,March 31,2011

I'll be talking with Marna Gatlin, Theresa Erickson, and hopefully an RE, next Thursday March 31st on Theresa's Voice America Radio Show about the film Eggsploitation.

Let me know what you think of this definition posted on the eggsploitation website for the trailer: "Eggsploitation can be defined: to plunder, pillage, rob, despoil, fleece, and strip ruthlessly a young woman of her eggs, by means of fraud, coercion or deception, to be used selfishly for another's gain, with a total lack of regard for the well-being of the donor."

I consider it an honor to speak publicly about this and would like to hear from anyone who has something they'd like to share with me regarding their feelings about this film, the issues it is raising, how its presented,anything at all,and as always,it will remain confidential as we talk about it more via phone or email before next Thursday.

A very timely article was posted yesterday that I wrote about on my below. Long story short, a few months ago I was quite taken aback by a donor-conceived blogger that wrote about Elizabeth Edwards-asking who will her kids mourn more, EE or their real mother the egg donor? It got me thinking, I got mad and then I did some more thinking. How WILL my kids feel about all this?

I will not try to predict what my kids will feel about our donor, their donor origins, but I feel more equipped each day to deal with whatever comes up for them. I hope that they will feel good enough about themselves to draw upon all that's available to them, especially from within.

The article linked in the previous post below is by a sperm donor-conceived adult in Australia...The blog post is dedicated to my Dad, Al Levine, of blessed memory.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

From Australia:True fatherhood is not about biology | smh.com.au

I miss my dad a lot lately, and not the genetic one,but my real father. He would have been completely in love with his beautiful granddaughters that he never got to meet-and they him- as much as he loved the beautiful granddaughters that he did get to meet.
Its almost 11 years that he is gone.
This blog post is dedicated to the one and only, Al Levine. I love you Dad.
Very interesting perspective from Australia in the article attached below..
http://m.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/true-fatherhood-is-not-about-biology-20110321-1c3px.html

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

DESPERATELY SEEKING A KIDNEY, BY SALLY SATEL

Its not the same thing, but I read this article while thinking about egg donation to see what parallels I might find. Very interesting to try to compare the two. See what you think. 

MAGAZINE   | December 16, 2007 
Desperately Seeking a Kidney 
By SALLY SATEL 
What you learn about people - and yourself - when you need them to donate an organ. 

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Egg Donor Guidebook NYS DOH


egg_donor_ny
This guidebook, prepared by the New York State Department of Health Task Force's Advisory Group on Assisted Reproductive Technologies, provides prospective egg donors with unbiased information. It suggests issues for you to consider and questions to ask before deciding whether or not to become a donor. You need to learn all you can about the process and think seriously about what it involves before you start. Becoming a donor is a very important decision.

To read more, please click this link to the NYS-DOH page.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Family Building Seminar 3.24.11 at The Institute for Reproductive Medicine & Science at Saint Barnabas

Family Building Via Egg Donation and/or Gestational Surrogacy
For Heterosexual, Same Sex Couples & Singles
Presented by REPRODUCTIVE POSSIBILITIES, LLC & IRMS at ST. BARNABAS
Thursday, March 24, 2011 6:30pm to 8:30pm
Refreshments Provided
The Institute for Reproductive Medicine & Science at Saint Barnabas
609 Washington Street, 2nd Floor
Hoboken, NJ 07030
Register for this free seminar and get more info by contacting:
info@reproductivepossibilities.com or call Helene 201-505-0078 ext. 409
SPEAKERS
Melissa Brisman, JD, Surrogate Agency Owner
Serena H. Chen, MD, Reproductive Endocrinologist
Claudia Pascale, PhD, Psychologist
Also attending will be parents who have experienced the process of egg donation
and gestational surrogacy as well as an experienced surrogate who will all share
their journeys.
Sponsored by:
www.reproductivepossibilities.com www.sbivf.com